Daryl C. W. O’Shea: Lazy Network Engineer

Drive-In Theatres; a magnet for mosquitoes and idiots alike

July 27th, 2006

So once again, even though I told everyone there was no way I was going to again, I got suckered into running the Midland Drive-In twice a week. When I begrudgingly agreed to, I said that I’d probably regret it. What was I thinking — probably?

A lot of things have changed at the drive-in. For starters one of the co-owners (Paul), the one who actually ran it, died last summer (which was the only reason I ran it on weekends last summer). As a result nearly all of the best staff immediately quit. Those who didn’t quit after he died had already quit before he died after his brother (the other owner) took over and expected them to actually work when they were there. I can’t say I blame them. Having your entire night screwed up for at best three hours pay at minimum wage certainly sucks. I know that, if I was looking to make money, I’d rather just go out or stay home and do consulting work or whatever else I’ve got on the go than waste my time at the drive-in. Luckily for ‘them’ I like to put on a show every once in a while and just do it for fun.

Anyway… I swear that every year both the customers and the staff gets dumber. Maybe one group is wearing off on the other. Maybe they’re both wearing off on each other in a vicious circle of idiocy.

Stupid comments from customers that stand out:

• Why don’t you have matinees?
• Do the movies play in the order listed in the program?
  You mean the program that says, “The first feature is… the second feature is… third feature is…?
• What’s a four feature? Why does it run so late?
• I left my ignition on for four hours, why is my battery dead?

Stupid comments from staff that stand out:

• Why don’t we have matinees?
• I didn’t feel like making any more popcorn.
  Did you tell that to the 150 people standing in front of the empty popcorn machine?
• Can I have every holiday weekend off this summer?
• Can I drink while I’m here?

Between all the stupidity and the generally crappy movies I’m becoming quite numb. At least the constant mosquito bites won’t bother me as much. Tip for movie goers: if you plan on swatting the mosquitoes, don’t wear a shirt you don’t want completely covered in your own blood.

Entry Filed under: Entertainment Industry